Tuesday, June 28, 2005

smoking hot

My client took me outside to continue our discussion of the software enhancements we were designing. I thought it was because he wanted to talk privately for some reason; turns out he just needed a cigarette.

The funny part (to me, I mean) is that as he lights up he shakes his head sheepishly and says “Don’t tell anyone, okay? I quit a couple months ago, and I don’t want them to know I’ve started again.”

I want to say “Don, I knew you still smoked from the minute you greeted me an hour ago. Your clothes smell like you slept in the fireplace. Your breath is like a forest fire. I suspect there is not a great deal of mystery in the office surrounding your smoking status.”

But I didn’t.


At Wed Jun 29, 10:53:00 AM PDT, Blogger Erik said...

this is funny. it's like, don't 'tell anyone, but i actually have an extra arm that grows out of my head.'

i dated a girl who obviously didn't want me to know she smoked. but if i could guess, i would say that she consistently smoked about 11 packs before every date we had. girls can be tricky, but this one wasn't too tricky, in my book.

At Wed Jun 29, 06:01:00 PM PDT, Blogger unca said...

Isn’t it strange how smoking is now viewed as worse than breaking all Ten Commandments? I had a similar experience with a co-worker I visited at her home. She was puffing somewhere out in the yard. “Well, now you know,” she said. It was like she was admitting to being serial killer. Reminds me of the “signs of our times” joke about the guy who goes into a drug store and proclaims in a loud voice, “Give me a carton of those condoms,” and then, in a very low whisper, adds, “and a pack of Camels, too, please.”


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