Thursday, January 20, 2005

fish story

link here

Apparently people are concerned that fish are eating dead bodies of tsunami victims, so many restaurants want their suppliers to assure them that their fish dont' come from the tsunami region.

Do we need to say how silly this is? What do the people imagine fish eat normally? They eat pieces of dead each other. They gulp each other down alive like popcorn. They eat other sea-animals' doo-doo. Aren't shrimp like the little garbage-suckers of the sea? The entire ocean is full of dead & rotting plants and animals. People eat carp, for pete's sake!

Which reminds me:

What's the difference between a lawyer and carp?
One's a scum-sucking bottom-dweller, the other one's a fish.


And while we're on the subject, what's wrong with cannibalism if it's an emergency and the person's already dead? I dont' get that. I understand being squeamish about actually having to dress out Aunt Tilly, but a lot of people seem to have a big moral issue about the consuming-another-person issue per se. I mean, the dead guy wasn't going to be using that quadriceps any more, was he? So what's the big deal? Next they'll be saying Woody Allen shouldn't marry his step-daughter. Wait, that was me saying Woody Allen is a total loser.

Well anyway, I had a point, and I'm pretty sure it had to do with how much smarter I am than other people. If you need to know anything, just ask.


3 Comments:

At Thu Jan 20, 04:32:00 PM PST, Blogger No_Newz said...

I can see it now... "Bryan, the other white meat"
"Bryan, it's what's for dinner" And just for giggles people will say stuff like, "Hey pal, what's eating you?" I hope I never live to see a day where I have to contemplate whether I should starve to death or eat Aunt Tilly.
Lois Lane

 
At Thu Jan 20, 07:48:00 PM PST, Blogger unca said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

 
At Thu Jan 20, 07:53:00 PM PST, Blogger unca said...

LOL reply, Lois. I do agree with Bryan, however, about the cannibal thing. I don't think it should be "normalized" but I don't understand all the fuss in an emergency. I remember seeing the movie, "Solyent Green" and watching Charlton Heston go nuts at the end shouting, "Solyent Green is people." I thought, "So that's it?" By the way, one of the funniest stories I've ever read is Mark Twain's "Cannabilism in the Cars"--hillarious.

 

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